Very powerful writing. Indeed, the body always watches, and the body always remembers.
I believe I understand the feelings and the sense of obstructed communication you are expressing, but as always, I can't claim to truly understand an experience I'm not neurologically wired to have, since I'm not neurodivergent (unless OCD and an obsession with suicide count).
For the time being, I'm managing. I'll have to see how things go in January. Please don't worry; you have enough issues of your own to be dealing with.
My friend? I'm doing well. I have been for at least 6 months. So much of my writing is reflections on life. I life I've been changing drastically during the time we know each other. Otoh, I feel these old experiences in the moment as I create about them.
Long complex way of saying. ICM doing well. All friends are welcome to lean on me. So long as it lasts, know what I mean?
Hi Johnny. It has been a long time. I have been through disappears form of what you could call autistic hell has anyone can imagine for the past several years.
I have not even touched or looked at Artfully Autistic since I'm not sure when, but the last thing that I published on Medium was "Autistically, We Soldier On" (July 9th, 2022.)
I wanted to let everyone know what was going on with me, but I was too Autistically sick to do that. I'm talking a severely long period of Autistic Burnout, Shut down, and even Regression. The regression was the hardest of all and has been because it includes a complete loss of skills you once knew and a complete loss of all executive functioning.
Many people (including so-called Autism experts) believe that Regression is something that only Autistic children experience, but it can happen at any point during an Autistic person's life.
Cynthia Kim, owner of the blog "Musings of an Aspie" has an article about Autistic Regression, which she refers to ( and I think more appropriately) "Fluid Adaptation."
The trajectory can be long and you never come back to the level that you were before but it includes a complete or partial loss of previously learned skill sets, decline in cognition, more intense and more frequent meltdowns, a partial or total depletion of all aspects of Executive Functioning – All of which I experienced and it took me down fast and it took me down hard.
It can be so severe (and for me it was) that it will affect every aspect of your life
It was that bad, and it still is bad. But, I am slowly...very slowly coming out of it – I hope.
I was unable to maintain ArtfullyAutistic at all, and I felt bad because I was two autistically sick to be able to let anybody know what was going on with me.
During all this time my life was a life that was much less than merely existing but closer to a slower form of being dead. That's the best way I can put it but it is pure Hell.
I've been reading a lot of your Substack posts and podcasts.
You know, and I don't usually tell people things like this, but sometimes, it's time to be totally transparent, wholehearted, and real. In fact, this is the way people should always be.
So, I just wanted you to know that you were my favorite Writer on ArtfullyAutistic, and you still are. You've got real talent and you got that unique johnny-ness that lets you shine out amongst all the others. Just you. Real talk about being Autistic as F**k Out Loud, All Over the Place.
I haven't published anything anywhere since 2020?
Hmm...
"If you've come this far, maybe you're willing to come a little further.
You remember the name of the town, don't you? I could use a good man to help me get my project on wheels.
I'll keep an eye out for you and the chessboard ready.
Remember, Hope is a good thing, maybe the best of things, and no good thing ever dies.
I will be hoping that
this letter finds you, and finds you well."
Your friend,
Keira Fulton-Lees
Artfully Autistic Advocate for Autism
p.s. - If the end of this post may be a little confusing, here's a hint:
One of my all time favorite movies is "The Shawshank Redemption"
Very powerful writing. Indeed, the body always watches, and the body always remembers.
I believe I understand the feelings and the sense of obstructed communication you are expressing, but as always, I can't claim to truly understand an experience I'm not neurologically wired to have, since I'm not neurodivergent (unless OCD and an obsession with suicide count).
Are you well? I haven't written. But I have, well... Worried.
For the time being, I'm managing. I'll have to see how things go in January. Please don't worry; you have enough issues of your own to be dealing with.
My friend? I'm doing well. I have been for at least 6 months. So much of my writing is reflections on life. I life I've been changing drastically during the time we know each other. Otoh, I feel these old experiences in the moment as I create about them.
Long complex way of saying. ICM doing well. All friends are welcome to lean on me. So long as it lasts, know what I mean?
Hi Johnny. It has been a long time. I have been through disappears form of what you could call autistic hell has anyone can imagine for the past several years.
I have not even touched or looked at Artfully Autistic since I'm not sure when, but the last thing that I published on Medium was "Autistically, We Soldier On" (July 9th, 2022.)
I wanted to let everyone know what was going on with me, but I was too Autistically sick to do that. I'm talking a severely long period of Autistic Burnout, Shut down, and even Regression. The regression was the hardest of all and has been because it includes a complete loss of skills you once knew and a complete loss of all executive functioning.
Many people (including so-called Autism experts) believe that Regression is something that only Autistic children experience, but it can happen at any point during an Autistic person's life.
Cynthia Kim, owner of the blog "Musings of an Aspie" has an article about Autistic Regression, which she refers to ( and I think more appropriately) "Fluid Adaptation."
The trajectory can be long and you never come back to the level that you were before but it includes a complete or partial loss of previously learned skill sets, decline in cognition, more intense and more frequent meltdowns, a partial or total depletion of all aspects of Executive Functioning – All of which I experienced and it took me down fast and it took me down hard.
It can be so severe (and for me it was) that it will affect every aspect of your life
It was that bad, and it still is bad. But, I am slowly...very slowly coming out of it – I hope.
I was unable to maintain ArtfullyAutistic at all, and I felt bad because I was two autistically sick to be able to let anybody know what was going on with me.
During all this time my life was a life that was much less than merely existing but closer to a slower form of being dead. That's the best way I can put it but it is pure Hell.
I've been reading a lot of your Substack posts and podcasts.
You know, and I don't usually tell people things like this, but sometimes, it's time to be totally transparent, wholehearted, and real. In fact, this is the way people should always be.
So, I just wanted you to know that you were my favorite Writer on ArtfullyAutistic, and you still are. You've got real talent and you got that unique johnny-ness that lets you shine out amongst all the others. Just you. Real talk about being Autistic as F**k Out Loud, All Over the Place.
I haven't published anything anywhere since 2020?
Hmm...
"If you've come this far, maybe you're willing to come a little further.
You remember the name of the town, don't you? I could use a good man to help me get my project on wheels.
I'll keep an eye out for you and the chessboard ready.
Remember, Hope is a good thing, maybe the best of things, and no good thing ever dies.
I will be hoping that
this letter finds you, and finds you well."
Your friend,
Keira Fulton-Lees
Artfully Autistic Advocate for Autism
p.s. - If the end of this post may be a little confusing, here's a hint:
One of my all time favorite movies is "The Shawshank Redemption"
I have missed you.
If you can, let's talk whenever you can. About whatever we care to.
Yeah I'm a sucker for that movie. I never read the story.
So very glad to hear from you.